Change. Not always the most warmly embraced word for me. In fact I find myself digging my heels in just typing the word. I know I am not alone in this. For example when I go out to eat with my very handsome seven year old and the waitress comes to take our order, I tend to order the item I always order. Everything in me says, “Try something new Kim. You might be surprised, it could be your new favorite!” But then my mind rushes back to that time when I ordered something new and it was awful. So I stick with what I know is safe. The problem is it becomes, well, boring. Predictable. Funny, while all this internal struggle is going on, I am telling my son, “You can’t eat chicken nuggets and fries the rest of your life.”
I realize that ordering a meal is minor when looking at the full vista of life. Our history plays a huge roll in how we deal with change on bigger issues. Like me, you may have experienced a heartbreaking loss or broken relationship. That experience is so powerful and so painful that it colors how you will approach future relationships. Like bad ordering off a menu, you say to yourself, “That was awful, I am not doing that again.” Recognizing it was bad for that situation alone is giving yourself good information, but, unfortunately, our minds don’t stop there. We take all that pain and claim a harmful definitive statement that looks something like this – “If I put myself out there, I am only going to get hurt again.” We want a guarantee that it won’t happen again.
The truth is, we will get hurt again. The crazy thing is, we know it. We will order something that wasn’t great. We will try something new and it may not go the way we planned. We may try to build a friendship only to find it didn’t work out. Changes of all kinds could come at us in such a way that we just want to stay in bed, pull the covers over our head a say those 3 strong words, “I am done.” That is great for a day but then we have to get back to living. Consider this verse, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10 God wants you and me to have a “full” life. God knows that the enemy will come at us wanting us to freeze up and give up, but that is NOT His plan. Embrace change because for all the things that have gone wrong, so many things have gone right. Here’s the thing, our journey will be made more pleasant if God doesn’t have to pry our hands from the old things He wants us to let go of. So try cello lessons. Ask the waiter what the specials are. Talk with the stranger at the grocery store. Say yes to a date night. Resolve to not allow one more minute of your life to be wasted in fear of change and give yourself grace in the process.